I was in Target today doing some shopping, because shopping is better than Prozac, when I heard some very classy young lady enthusiastically answer her cell. I was in the changing room trying on some very hot items from the Libertine line (which is almost as exciting for me as Proenza Schouler was, but not quite) when I hear the following:

"Hey, I sure missed you this past weekend. I had a girl for you ... and a girl for me ... and we each could have taken a leg and broken her in half like a wish bone. Yeah, yeah, well, I just got $1200 from her asshole Daddy and I'm going to buy her a cell phone to keep track of her ... She's in foster care. Yeah, I gotta go to parenting classes ... I'm not going to learn anything because really, what's there to learn about parenting ... oh yeah?"